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A Special Candle Wedding Favor

Weddings are a time of happiness and love, a time to rejoice and be surrounded by friends and family you hold dear. Giving each guest a unique candle wedding favor will surely immortalize your special day forever, and allow attendees to take a home a useful, heartfelt memento of this very special occasion. Shopping for the perfect favors may feel impossible to you, but there are a variety of different candles you can choose to present your guests with on your wedding day, and various resources to help you do just that.

When you plan a wedding, you also plan on the occasion being memorable, an event your guests will be hard pressed to forget. What better way to do that than with sincere favors? There are a multitude of different candles you can present your guests, and a variety of websites and specialty shops catering specifically to wedding favors. For a cute, fun little favor, you can consider miniature candles shaped like a wedding cake. These are cute, definitely wedding oriented, and will work with almost any theme. If you’d like, you may also want to consider tea light sets. In a variety of colors and designs, these candles will suit almost any celebration. What’s more, they’re fairly cheap! Definitely a plus for a wedding on a budget.

Let’s say you’re having a theme wedding, and it’s taking place on the beach. Obviously, you’ll want a candle favor that will take your guests back to that special day. How about miniature candles shaped like flip flops? If it’s a casual beach occasion, these will most certainly do the trick. If it’s a more formal beach event, beautiful glass sailboat tea light holders may be just the ticket. They’re classy, and they’ll definitely serve as a beautiful reminder for your guests. This illustrates how easy it can be to find favors that suit your unique wedding theme, for both formal and casual affairs.

You want your wedding to be as special as possible, every detail taken care of and everyone kept happy. The favors you choose for your guests will forever memorialize your special day, so you want them to be a reflection of your heartfelt gratitude for your guest’s presence. Now, your wedding guests will have something to look back on to remember a time of joy, and a time of love, forever captured in these favors.

About the Author

Alice Yap recommends http://www.CherishedWeddingFavors.com for candle favors.

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All About Love

How do you know if you’ve ever been in love? Most people would argue that although being in love with someone is non-tangible, there is absolutely no doubt in their mind of it existing. In fact, if you are questioning whether or not you are in love, then you are most certainly not.

While I do not doubt for a second the existence of being in love (albeit being one of those sad individuals yet to experience it), I am somewhat perplexed over our perception of what constitutes humanities most sought after experience.

For me, falling in love with someone is a decision made based on the successful matching of ones own predetermined criteria or preferences.

I fondly refer to the preliminary stage of partner selection as the ‘terminator glasses’ phase, since it filters through a potential mate’s attributes and matches them off against our own unique preferences.

On the New Years Eve just passed I went to meet friends at a bar where we would be celebrating the evening. There, waiting at the door with my friend, I saw HIM for the first time. I did a quick terminator scan:

Height: Around 6 foot. MATCH.
Build: Not too skinny, not too fat, not too buff. MATCH.
Hair: Short dark brown. Not over the top alla David Beckham. MATCH.
Complexion: Dark olive. MATCH.
Lips: Plump. MATCH.
Smile: Oh my God. MATCH.
Eyes: Big, brown, expressive, with long thick lashes. MATCH!
Stance: Gentle, not cocky. MATCH.
Nationality: Clearly foreign, probably Brazilian. MATCH.

With the terminator glasses still firmly planted on my face, the confirmed Brazilian was permitted to move onto the second part of phase one: interaction. This is often the most fatal part of any potential relationship, since every sentence uttered, every look given, and every movement is put through the filter of the terminator glasses. Any miss-match could lead to premature relationship death. Very little is forgiven during this part, especially if one’s program is set at ‘long term mate’. In saying this, it is also my favorite part of the process as it is the most fun. I see it as a game we both know we’re playing, but refuse to acknowledge as existing. One can withdraw from the game at anytime without repercussion (that is, of course, when both parties are working under the same set of rules. If this is not the case a few unwanted phone numbers are collected, followed by a few awkward conversations. And depending on how weak one is – unwanted dates followed by unwanted kisses, possibly ending in unwanted sex!).

Stage two, ‘the rose coloured glasses’ phase, is extremely dangerous and not usually approached with caution by either candidate. Depending on the impact of stage one, bombs warning ‘relationship doom’ could be dropped right in front of ones eyes, yet getting let go un-noticed. Everything appears and is, invariably, utterly workable. Despite my cynicism, this stage is defiantly more exciting than the terminator phase, albeit being laced with the fear of it all ending. The premature ‘I love you’ could escape ones mouth, falling like a ball onto a roulette table. The stakes are high, but it could also very well pay off and pass you onto stage three. Or not…

Declaring the title of stage three is difficult. And the truth is, I don’t know what to call it because I’m usually making my way to the green exit sign above the fire escape before you can say ‘marry me’.

My experience with stage three is that I usually realize Mr Perfect is human. I resist accepting him just the way he is, and try to point out where he is lacking (he is usually not so open to my constructive criticism. I wonder why?). This of course does not lead him to change his ways, but firmly ground himself in them (and resent me in the process). Love and commitment gets swapped with fear and dependence. Some stay to battle it out to the very end, most head straight for the green exit light.

People claim at this point that they have ‘fallen out of love’. My argument is that they were never in love in the first place. One of my favourite movies, ‘Moulin Rouge’, melodically states, “The greatest thing you will ever learn, is just to love, and be loved in return”. I believe this is what we think being in love is all about. Yet being loved in return implies that there is a condition to your giving love. So romantic love is conditional love. If romantic love only goes one-way, it is termed unrequited love or even ‘desperate’.

What if I said that true love can only be unconditional? And inside of that, true love can only mean 100% acceptance of the subject, just the way they are and just the way they’re not. What if love, real love, is just loving?

About the Author

Davina deWitts runs a clothing accessories store, with stock from Australia’s most talenteddesigners. She also believes she’s a social commentator, finding intriguing what most consider banal. If however you wouldlike to indulge her, read Fashion Blog.

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Are You Too Busy For Friendship?

If you’re a typical person in today’s modern world, you’re very, very busy. You may be trying to juggle a mate at home, kids of various ages, a full time job, and aging parents who take up more and more of your time. Your job probably demands a lot of you, and you may also be taking classes to upgrade your skills, and you may be volunteering in your community.

Many of us today are on the go all the time. We rush from appointment to appointment until we collapse exhausted.

One place that many of us cut back is on spending time unwinding with our friends. We often feel guilty just at the thought of taking time to hang around. Spending time just relaxing with friends seems like a luxury we can’t afford.

If you are one of those people who is too busy for friendship, maybe it’s time to rethink your life priorities.

Even though all the new technological toys we have today were supposed to free up our time and make us more connected, it can have an opposite effect.

When we do spend time with our families or friends, many of us are also tied to the computer, or our cell phone or we’re busy sending and receiving text messages.

Our attention is never really where we are. Our mind is split. We’re never really committed to working when we are at work, and we’re never really with the people we care about, because someone else is on the line.

A better, more exciting offer might come in any minute, on our cell phone, or in our email.

Many people, once they become adults, become so busy, and their life priorities are so fractured, that one of the first things to be set aside is time to spend relaxing, and re-creating with friends.

Those lazy days when life seemed to be about spending quality time with your family and friends seem to belong to a different century.

If you currently feel frazzled and empty, one reason may be that you have let yourself become too busy to make time for the relationships you already have. And if you don’t feel frazzled and empty, it could be that you are using your business as a way of keeping your inner emptiness hidden from yourself.

When we spend time with the people who truly love us and accept us, we have a chance to let go of our false roles. We can feel more accepted and relaxed when we are surrounded by those who care about us. We don’t need to be on the go all the time, and we don’t need to be putting on a front.

Yet how many people today, living modern, busy lives, make friendship a priority?

Very often, friendship is one of the first casualties thrown overboard as a life speeds out of control.

If the main reason you haven’t been getting together with old friends, or new friends you’d like to know better is because you’re too busy, take a good look at how you spend your time.

Compare it with your real values and priorities in life. Is your hectic lifestyle really bringing you the quality of life that you want?

If you have become too busy for friends, why has this happened? Are you pursuing material toys in your life at the expense of relationships with other human beings? Have you allowed your time to be over-committed because you never say “No” to anyone? Do you insist on doing things yourself that could be delegated to others? If so, why? Do you believe that everything depends on you?

Examine whether the way you are currently spending your time accurately reflects your deepest values and priorities. Make sure that you schedule adequate time for the things that are truly most important to you.

Are there any people you could call right now and be assured of a pleasant welcome?

Are these people that you could count on to help you in a crisis? Can you have close talks with them? Do you have fun when you are together? Are you happy to have them in your life?

Making the effort to call your friends more regularly, and to accept more of the invitations you receive from others, can improve your social life in a hurry!

If you really want to keep friends in your life, make a space in your schedule, and a space in your heart for them.

About the Author

This article is written by Royane Real who is the author of several self help books, including “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want – Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends”If you want more ideas on how you can improve your social life and make more friends, download it today at http://www.royanereal.com

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Being Successfully Single Until the Right One Comes Along!

Our planet is brimming with a random lottery of people; undeniably though, finding true love can be considered a risky business. Love is supposed to be a beautiful feeling with lots of happy thoughts emanating from the whole package of being in love, so why is finding true love is considered a difficult challenge?

Is finding love really so hard though? Or do we just make it hard? Finding love is not hard, but sometimes it takes a long time. So if you are single now, and I assume that you are, then you are likely goint go be single for awhile.

Here are some advantages of being single:

1. You are independent Basically you can do what you want when you want. You don’t have to wait, you don’t have to ask, you can just go.

2. You have more time When you’re single; you don’t have to sit around doing nothing. Want to go to the gym? Want to join the hiking club? Play an instrument? How about watch your favorite video for 10th time? Want to take a course? Learn a new hobby? Who’s stopping you?

3. You don’t have to deal with another’s personal habits You can sleep without listening to someone’s snoring and hog all the blankets all the time and nobody cares. You don’t have to pick up after anyone but yourself. And you don’t even have to pick up after yourself if you don’t want to. Give your patience a well-deserved break.

4. You can be spontaneous Be daring! Do what you want when you want to and who cares if you don’t get to dinner until midnight? Do something out of the ordinary, without having to get permission first or calling ahead. This is freedom!

5. You can focus on your career You can channel your energy into your work. Without a relationship, you have a lot more time. Put in those extra hours and impress your boss, or take on new projects.

6. You are your own boss Relationships need compromise and you don’t always get your own way. Both people in a relationship have to give something up for the greater good of the relationship. Do what you want and treat yourself more. Selfishness is good for the soul (in small doses).

Don’t stress! That special someone is out there and you can and will find them. It just takes time.

In the meantime, enjoy being single. In fact, I believe that if you can’t be happy being single, you will never be happy with your soulmate! Kind of like rich and poor. There are lots of poor people who are happy and lots that are unhappy. Same with rich people — lots are happy and lots are unhappy. Now what do you think would happen if we took a poor who was unhappy, and gave them lots of money?

You guessed it! They would probably be happy for a short time, but it wouldn’t last and eventually they would be just as unhappy as they were.

Ever wonder why that is? Being happy comes from inside of you not outside. OK, you are single — enjoy yourself and that special person will come along before you know it!

I hope that you have found this article useful in your search. If you would like to more about finding your soulmate, please visit my website Soulmate Secrets.

About the Author

Robert Johanssen is a Psychologist and Author living in British Columbia. He has publish Ebooks and articles on psychology, singles, relationships and Popular Culture. Visit his website, Secrets for finding your soulmate for advice, tips and resources for singles, and finding that special someone.

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Buying a Tungsten Carbide Wedding Band Ring

When you decide to marry, one of the most important decisions will be about your ring. Traditionally, gold, white gold, silver and platinum have been used in wedding bands. But today, the selection of metals is broader, reflecting the change in our tastes and lifestyle. Tungsten carbide is one of the new metals from which jewelry designers have begun to craft wedding band rings, offering a wide variety of styles and designs that fit every taste and budget.

What is Tungsten Carbide?
On its own, tungsten is a very hard and dense metal, with the highest melting point of all metals – 6,100 degrees Fahrenheit. Alone, tungsten is vulnerable to scratches and damage just like any other metal, it gains its extreme hardness by being combined with a carbon alloy, transforming it into tungsten carbide, with a hardness between 8.5 and 9.5 on the Mohs hardness scale. The strength of tungsten carbide has made it widely used for decades in industrial applications – it is four times harder than titanium, twice as hard as steel and almost impossible to scratch. The resulting metal can be designed into wedding band rings that are both visually stunning to please the eye and durable enough to withstand everyday use. These rings can only be damaged through extreme measures, such as abrasion from diamonds or being struck with a hammer.

Choosing Your Tungsten Carbide Wedding Band Ring
Make sure you ask your jeweler which metal was used in the finishing or binding process. Many manufacturers of tungsten carbide wedding band rings use cobalt as a binder, mostly because it is cheaper to produce. The problem with cobalt is that it bonds with oils in the skin and leeches out of the ring resulting in oxidation. The oxidation appears similar to tarnished sliver, but cannot be removed by polishing or grinding. The better choice is nickel-binder tungsten carbide which is chemically inert, will not oxidize and because it is hypoallergenic, there is no danger of irritation to the skin. Be careful about dealing with a jeweler that doesn’t specify that their tungsten wedding bands are made with the nickel binder alloy. Many jewelry stores do not know which alloy they are selling, and if they don’t know, it is most likely cobalt alloy or pure tungsten, which lacks the hardness of tungsten carbide and are easily scratched.

Because of tungsten carbide’s extreme hardness, wedding bands made from this metal cannot be sized like gold, silver or platinum rings. When you are ready to purchase, make sure that you take extra care in determining the proper size. In regards to engraving a tungsten carbide ring, it is possible, but the results will be very faint and difficult to read.

Finally, since your tungsten carbide wedding band ring is not indestructible, it makes sense to get a warranty, especially against breakage. Under normal usage there should be little or no wear on both the polish and the textures of your tungsten carbide wedding band ring and you will never need to use your warranty.

About the Author

Suneva is a part-time copywriter at Titanium Kay that specializes in titanium and tungsten men’s wedding rings.

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Different approaches to Sexual Experience

Ever notice how men talk about ‘having sex’ while women talk about ‘making love?’ That kind of hits the nail on the head when it comes to how men and women approach sex. Men are pretty direct when it comes to sex — they are arounsed easily, usually by visual stimulation, what they see. Women are much more complex, and require a more complicated experience to become aroused and take longer.

While that sounds simple, (and it is!) if you are going to improve your sexual technique, you must keep it in mind constantly.

So lets have a look at this ‘more complicated experience,’ and see what we can learn.
Women enjoy sex with more of their senses, touch, smell, taste, and hearing. Notice that I did NOT say sight. Women are aroused by sight as well as the other senses, but this is secondary.

Women love things like ‘taking your time’, ‘anticipation’, and ‘foreplay’ because they make the experience richer and involve more senses.

Lets look at a few of these in more detail:

1. Hearing. Women love to hear romantic sensual things. Notice that is sensual not sexual language. Women love love to hear you describe your feelings. Men are more direct and want to hear things like, “you are so big.” Women like to hear things like, “your skin is so soft.”

2. Touching. Women love to be touched and stroked. Stroking, cuddling, and touching is all great stuff that arouses women. Stroke her lightly with the tips of your fingers up and down her body, avoiding sexual areas. There will be lots of time for that later! Build up tension and anticipation.

3. Smelling. This could be scented candles or inscense. Women love smelling and being smelled.

4. Tasting. Women love to be fed all kinds of wonderful things like strawberries, sweets, and wine.

5. Sight. While generally women are not turned on by sight, most women love to look into your eyes. This kind of ultra-romantic stuff is a huge turn-on for most women.

6. Kissing. Kissing is a kind of touching. Our lips have tons of nerve endings in them which is why contact with our lips feels good. Make kissing an experience instead of jumping right in with your tongue! Lightly brush her lips with yours and then pull away. Keep doing this ‘brushing’ contact, and you will excite the nerve ending on both of your lips. Play with your lips lightly and gently.

Remember when you were learning to drive? One of the first things you learn is – don’t gun the engine while its cold! Well sex is just like that!

About the Author

Robert Johanssen has written widely on sex, sexuality, couples, relationships and singles. Visit his website and Learn more about sexual technique or Discover Tantric Sex

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Find your Soulmate

Soulmate. Once upon a time we wondered if we were ever going to meet our own. We ask if the one we are with right now is the one truly meant for us. There are just too many stories about people finding “the one”, their “match”, their “twin soul”, that at times it almost feels too magical to believe, yet we keep on believing. Love, indeed, moves in mysterious ways. If you want to know if it’s possible, it is. You can find your soulmate.

Soulmates are believed to be our “love match”, the other twin of our soul. If you have episodes of yearning and longing, that’s because you haven’t met yet the special someone who can fill up your loneliness. If you got fears, he definitely has ways to subside them. He can put an end to your uncertainty; he spells happiness. Soulmates rather complement us than complete us.

The first sign in discerning if HE is the one is when your heart and mind tell you that HE is so. You will know it even if you don’t know how. That’s the joy that soulmates bring to everyone.

Knowing each of us has a matched soul is a beautiful thing to think of. The universe is so huge that the journey in finding our soulmates seems like a blanket of overwhelming adventure. The thought seems mysterious but tugs inspiringly at the heartstrings. It makes us want to wake up each day with that burning desire that we might just stumble to them. The scenario can get really delightful, what with a not so perfect world that we have, finding your soulmate in the most strange times is perhaps the most beautiful thing that can happen to any individual.

So, the question is, how do you find your soulmate when you have no place to start and you have no hint at whom to look for? Simple, it only takes affirmation and awareness, and at the right time you will be able to recognize the “one”.

AFFIRMATION Believe that you will meet him. While it is true that you don’t have to go on searching literally for your soulmate, it takes a positive affirmation to help you attract the energies of the universe that may lead you to him. As with the Christian principle: Ask and you shall receive. Maintain a conscious effort of believing and anticipating that one day soon you will meet. It can be an everyday exercise you can practice that can fuel you to live your life with passion for love.

AWARENESS It would help a great deal if you can keep your eyes and heart open for possible encounters with a soulmate. Know in your heart that you wish to meet him and imagine in your mind what a dream it would be when that happens. Anyone can pass for a soulmate so try not to discriminate people in advance. Good for you if you have the gift of discernment, but who are the chosen few who have this talent? The strategy is to be in control. Cling on to that aspiration that your soulmate is not too far away. Be aware of signs that surround you because who knows, he could also be looking for you.

About the Author

Robert Johannsen MA is a psychology and freelance author living in British Columbia. Robert’s articles on Psychology, Relationships and Popular Culture have been published in numerous magazines in Canada, the US and the UK. His popular Ebook, Proven Secrets for Attracting your Soulmate has helped people from all walks of life find that special someone since 2000. Visit his recently updated website, http://www.soulmate-secrets.com for a free chapter of his powerful book.

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Friends Grieve the Passing of a Homeless Man

We made our way down the muddy path through some bushes and trees to the river bank. Chuck’s [the deceased] dog, Lucy, cowered near his tent, which was still set up. Less than four feet high in the center, it was open and showed old newspapers as insulation against the ground and looked to have sleeping space for two or maybe three. Some homeless workers were present, along with a few friends of the deceased. There were twelve in all.

I remember Sandy, in her late forties or early fifties, the worn looking woman who took Chuck into her home for his last few weeks; her obviously bereaved son; another woman in a green jacket about Sandy’s age; and the fourth, a long-time friend of Chuck’s, who was holding a fishing pole, a cap, and a half-gallon Vodka bottle filled with Chuck’s ashes.

Father Ron was introduced as a “friend of the homeless, who works hard to help people living in poverty.”

Father Ron began the service:

“It is my privilege to be here, today. Last year we buried Virgil, who froze to death. And it seems like every year something happens to some of our homeless friends. And we dare not forget. We have two things in this life, essentially memory and hope. You have to have both of them, and to keep them intact, so that you can make it day by day.”

Before he went on, he invited the small group of congregants to speak, noting that all were present for different reasons and different motivations.

“Chuck was my friend. I’d known him for about two years,” began Ed, who drove the Homeless Outreach van. “I enjoyed his honesty with life. He was doing what he wanted to do, and I’m sure he’s doing what he wants to do, now.” He recounted some memories of Chuck and Mike Leavitt, Utah’s Governor, teaching the governor how to fish. “He wasn’t aware that it was the governor,” quipped Ed, to the audience’s laughter.

“Chuck was stubborn as all get out, at times,” resumed Ed, reflecting on his unwillingness to come in for shelter or for medical aid. “But he’d always want to tell you a story, always had a smile and a handshake for you. I know that Chuck has found a fishing hole someplace.”

The woman in the green jacket, showing appreciation for Ed’s remarks added: “That sums it up. Yep, Chuck liked to fish. He was a fishing fool. He was out here for months straight on the peak of the river. Did nothing but fish.” Then, her tone softened. “He was very loved,” she said. “I’ll miss him.”

“Well, hopefully, in heaven,” commented Jeff St. Romain, the local head of Volunteers for America. “They don’t give tickets out for fishing with two fishing poles.” The crowd laughed at this inside joke about Chuck’s problems with the law. “Three allowed!” Jeff continued. “He had a great sense of humor.”

“I’ve known Chuck for about four and a half years, now,” said Pamela, the organizer of this event. “He and Lucy. He reminded me that they came as a package. What I loved most about Chuck was his openness and frankness. What you saw you got. He didn’t play games, and he didn’t mince words. You knew exactly where you stood with him, what he needed, and what he thought about things. I loved the twinkle in his eye. I loved his sense of humor. Even when he was in the hospital and very sick, he still kept his sense of humor.”

The keeper of the ashes spoke through tears: “In the ten years since I’ve known Chuck, he’s been my friend, my brother, sometimes my father and even my grandfather. He loved the outdoors: fishin’, children and vodka, not necessarily in that order.” This delighted the audience. “He didn’t get a chance to do all he wanted,” he concluded. “But there’s nothin’ he wouldn’t do for a friend.”

“Chuck was my friend, too,” said Sandy’s son. “Mostly just a fishin’ partner, but he turned out to be a lot more. And I love that man, is all I can say.” He broke down at the end of his remarks.

He was followed by his mother’s comments: “I loved Chuck. Chuck was my friend for four years, and my son’s friend–dear friend to him. I’m going to miss him. He did say he’d be waitin’ in heaven, though.”

At the end of the service, we all went over to the riverbank, and Chuck’s friend scattered his ashes from the Vodka bottle into the river, threw in a baseball cap on which was written, “Help, I’ve fallen and can’t get up,” followed by his fishing pole.

Excerpted from Street People, Case Histories of the Homeless
www.gratitudepress.com

About the Author

Leslie Reynolds-Benns, PhD, author of Street People and more recently of Confession is Good for More than the Soul. Speaker, trainer, workshop leader, community activist and wedding officiant. Sign up for a FREE 4-part mini e-course – CREATING YOUR OWN REALITY

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How To Make More People Like You

When you meet new people for the first time, do you usually like most of the new people that you meet?

Or do you find that you usually dislike new people, unless they can eventually prove after a long time that they deserve your friendship?

Perhaps you have never thought about this before. And you may even wonder if it’s really important. Does it really matter very much if you like most people when you first meet them, or if you decide to like them much later, after you get to know them better?

Your attitude to the new people you encounter will actually have a big impact on the number of friends you make, and the social life you enjoy.

Why? Because the attitude you have when you first meet somebody will affect the way that you treat those people, and the impression you make on them.

When you have the attitude of liking someone you have just met, they will feel pleased to know you and will want to know you better. They will probably sense that you like them, and they will be more inclined to judge you in a kind and positive way.

If you like most of the people you encounter, you will have a far larger group of people in your friendship pool. When you genuinely like other people, they will be much more inclined to like you back.

On the other hand, when you don’t like people when you meet them, they will feel uncomfortable in your presence and will want to avoid you. They may sense that you don’t like them. They may even decide to dislike you in return. Every person that you dislike will automatically be excluded from the pool of people who can become your friends.

When you don’t like the majority of people that you meet, your friendship pool for making friends is much smaller.

If there is one secret to having friends, it’s a simple one, and here it is: Like Other People!

If you dislike almost everyone you meet, how many friends do you think you will make with this attitude? Very few of us want to get closer to a person when we sense that he doesn’t like us.

If you usually operate with a big long mental list of reasons to reject others, you will assume that other people are also deciding to reject you. If you routinely dislike other people because you are looking for their flaws, you won’t believe that others can really like you. When you reject other people for trivial reasons, you will also assume that others will reject you for trivial reasons.

This negative attitude will make you very suspicious when you encounter others, since you will be anticipating rejection from other people at any moment.

Wouldn’t it be easier and more effective to give everyone a break?

When you meet other people, give other people a break, and give yourself a break too.

When you meet people for the first time, start out with the assumption that most people you encounter are nice human beings and worthy of your friendship. You can choose to believe that just about everybody you meet actually likes you, and that you like most other people. People who are very socially confident and have a lot of friends tend to have this attitude.

If this hasn’t been your attitude so far, you can work to change it.

How can you change this?

Whenever you meet someone new, actively look for things to like in that person. Look for their interesting and unique qualities. Suspend your need to judge and analyze others, and simply meet them as ordinary human beings who are struggling and evolving, and making their way through life, just like you. Find things that you like about each person, and let yourself feel that you actually like them.

You will find that when your attitude changes, the world will become a friendlier place, because you have become a friendlier person.

About the Author

This article is written by Royane Real, author of “How You Can Have All the Friends You Want – Your Complete Guide to Finding Friends, Making Friends, and Keeping Friends” If you want to improve your social life, download it today at http://www.royanereal.com

Read more: How To Make More People Like You

Love is in the Air

Well, here we are in February and many people are celebrating St. Valentines. It is a good time to think about love and relationships to put a bit of warmth in our lives after a long winter.

Today, I would like to look at what love is. The English language only has one word for love and it is used interchangeably for almost everything. We can say I love my husband and I love Chocolate.

Both are using the same word and it is only by the context that we can ascertain the difference. The Greeks, on the other hand, have four different words to describe love. Each word gives a different nuance to the word that helps us understand more fully what is being spoken of.

I want to look with you at the four Greek words for love.

These are:1) Eros
2) Storge
3) Philia
4) Agape

Eros:

The first type of love we are all familiar with. Our English word Erotica is derived from this word. Sadly, some people never get passed this type of love and base their relationships purely on sexual attraction. This is the type of love that merchandisers tend to play on with the public trying to get us to buy their products to make us more attractive to the opposite sex. Unfortunately, aromatherapy is being misrepresented by these same people also to traffic their products. You would be surprised to see how many products are being offered specifically to attract the opposite sex using aroma.

Studies have been done trying to prove the theory of attraction through Pheromones based on animal instincts. I personally feel that attraction of a life partner is much more than the basis of his/her smell. In fact, it was impossible for me to fall in love with my fiancé based on smell as we met through ICQ on the Internet. It was impossible for smell to play any part in our meeting. Our relationship was based on character and friendship which later developed into love. You can say we met each other and we just clicked (pun intended)

So, the point is that erotic love is not a deep meaningful love but superficial and based on sexual attractiveness only.

2) Storge:

This type of love is what we find in families between the different members. It is the love of mother, father, brothers and sisters. This is a much stronger type of love and involves commitment. “Blood is thicker than water” and most people will do all they can to stand behind their families.

3) Philia:

This type of love is pertaining to what we might call a brotherly love. Not brotherly in the sense of family, but in the sense of kinsmenship. This is the type of love that makes us want to help the little old lady cross the street safely and watch out for our fellow man. It is a good type of love and helps us to see others as needing our love but, sadly, it can often also be a selfish love. Many people only show love to others if they can get something out of it. L Thankfully, most people love out of pure motives.

4)Agape:

The fourth type of love is called Agape love. This is the highest form of love there is. This is an unconditional love for others in spite of their character flaws and weaknesses. It is a difficult love to obtain simply because we, as humans, are usually concerned more with ourselves and how the world and people around us affect us. In order to love in the agape way, we must overcome our selfishness and look to the needs of others. Prime examples of this type of love are people like Mother Theresa, Cardinal Leger etc. These are people who look out for others interests above their own. It is a special kind of love that needs to be cultivated for it to grow. We can only achieve this type of unselfish loving as we put the needs of others as a priority.

Without getting religious here, I just want to tell you there is a verse from the Bible that fits well with this concept. It is called the Golden Rule. Luke 10:27, says “Love your neighbour as yourself” and “Therefore, whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets.” -Matthew 7:12 . All relgions of the world share in this same philosophy.

One thing that stuck out to me as I read these is that it says to love your neighbor as yourself. Sadly, many people in this day and age, don’t love themselves. If you don’t love yourself how can you love others? Unconditional love needs to start with you. You must learn to accept the fact that you are a special and unique person. Yes you have flaws, we are all human, but these flaws do not make you less of a person. Learn to love yourself in spite of your shortcomings and accept yourself for who you are. As you love yourself you will find it easier to love others.

The second thing that stands out is that the Golden rule says to do what you want others to do to you. This is not the same as “Don’t do to others what you don’t want them to do to you.” It is not a position of avoiding doing evil or harming others but an actual DOING of something for others. This requires action on your part. It says “DO unto others”. It is when we realize that we reap the rewards of love as we involve ourselves in the lives of others, making their lives easier and more pleasant, as we would want our own lives to be.

Enjoy the month of Love and remember always to love yourself and to DO something for someone each day.

About the Author

This article is bought to you by Sharron Myers. Sharron Myers has been a teacher of Spiritual Truth for over 30 years. She also is a Certified Aromatherapist and Personal Development Consultant. Be sure to check out her site: www.sharron-myers.com

To Live the Life You Want, Learn the Skills You Need
www.sharron-myers.com

Read more: Love is in the Air

Online Dating: Overcoming the Stress and Nerves with the First Date

As an individual raised with little opportunity to develop social skills, I had a particularly difficult time with the dating scene. I am happily married now, but during my years of dating, I felt that it would never happen. With the many years using online dating services, I have learned many useful ways of establishing positive initial interaction. In this article I will share with you ideas that will give you a little more ease with dating and coping with the anxiety on the first date.

First, there are a few questions we must address and bring out into the open. How much should we get to know the potential date before meeting?  What discussion or prefacing is required with your potential date prior to the meeting?  How does this potential date feel about you, or does this person also share in this anxiety?  After the rendezvous is established where will you meet to insure safety, enjoyment and relaxation?  

Lets dive into the first question: How much should we get to know the potential date before meeting?  This question begs of the actual legitimacy of the potential date. Is this, person really genuine?  What is this persons background?  These questions are not as easy to answer, but we can start with the following. The method of communication is incredibly important.  Phone communication although a little nerve racking, can break the ice and establish an initial understanding of who this person is.  Try to avoid creating a mental image of this person as this can really increase expectations and also give the other person an unfair disadvantage (i.e. relating the voice to a physical mental image). The phone conversation can also shed light on this person’s general character.

This leads to what discussions or prefacing is required.  It is important to acknowledge that this place we live is very diverse and the person’s character is one of the most important attributes of desirability.  Be softly direct when inquiring about his or her background without invoking the feeling that you are drilling the person which is a real “turn-off”.  I have used this idea many times which turn’s out to be a really enjoyable exercise. Write down a few background questions to ask prior to calling the potential date and go from there. The conversation can take on with its own energy from there and it will be very easy to get a good feeling for the person. That is to say, if the person is not forthright, it will most likely come through in the conversation.

In most cases, the other person will exhibit the same anxiety as you. Keep this in mind, as it will help your nerves a little. Being confident, honest, direct and respectful will help you and the date feel an increased level of comfort whether your on the phone, or on the first date.

On this first date, make sure that you select, or mutually agree to a place that will help the date flourishes but keep the other person wanting more.  Obviously, you should select a meeting place that is well lit and where there will be many eyes watching you for increased safety. However, the place that you will spend the most time should be softly lit so that most of the concentration can be focused on the content of the conversation and less on physical characteristics. More importantly, span the first date no more than that of a small snack. You can consider this a “weed-out” session. If there is chemistry during the date, he or she will leave waiting more. Conversely, if there is no chemistry, not much time was lost and not much money was spent.

Remember, these important ideas to engender ease and confidence during the initial contact through online dating services. Choose a method of communication prior to the meeting that will help you determine the persons forthrightness.  Understand that the other person is probably feeling the same level of anxiety to which you can offer the comfort. Finally, choose a place that demonstrates safety and allows for a short but memorable experience.

About the Author

Patrick Hood-Daniel is an Urban Designer/Architect that pays special attention to our social atmosphere in relation to our physical environment. He is also the developer of http://www.datinganddating.com an online dating service where members can find dates in a totally unique way.

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Soulmate Connection

We know there are magical signs once we meet our soulmates face to face. Expect it to be not ordinary. Imagine a fairy-tale coming alive. Most certainly, there would be sparks flying, butterflies in the stomach, stuttered sentences, ease of communication, physical attractions, love-at-first-sights, answered prayers, love remembered from dreams; in other words, a soulmate connection.

At first, the connection may be quite dream-like and a little too overwhelming until it turns into a vague familiarity. It may also be intense there may be no words to describe it perfectly. Details of soulmate connections can every so often overpower love itself. It’s spirit-lifting. It’s addictive. It’s without doubt a “connection” between two hearts. It’s beyond anything you have experienced.

Meeting your soulmate at this time and age is a rare gift, one who’s interested needs to plumb the depths of all possibilities, if not, just wait for it to happen. But for some, waiting can be as dreadful as searching without finding the “right one”. So might as well go for it and enjoy every second of your “finding your soulmate expedition”. At least, you will not tell yourself you did not try.

Romance novels and studies on “finding your soulmate” have it all – the unbelievable peaks and lows people go through just to meet their soulmates. And their stories have all one thing to say – once they have met their soulmates, it was as if they have known and loved each other before. And they can’t wait to spend their lives with each other forever.

With all these far-fetched concepts about soulmate connection, who then do you think wouldn’t do anything for love? If it’s that heavenly perfect, anyone will surely risk anything just to experience it. How about you? How far would you go for love?

It’s every girl’s dream for sure – to meet her soulmate and experience a soulmate connection. Because if the feeling is euphoric, why not? If meeting your soulmate is all you think of and soulmate connection has captured your creative imagination and loving heart, it becomes hard-wired into your brain. It’s all you’re going to think of and focus on. The best thing about finding your soulmate is that you will love with a pure heart and with the cleanest intention to give your all to that one special person.

About the Author

Robert Johannsen MA is a psychology and freelance author living in British Columbia. Robert’s articles on Psychology, Relationships and Popular Culture have been published in numerous magazines in Canada, the US and the UK. His popular Ebook, Proven Secrets for Attracting your Soulmate has helped people from all walks of life find that special someone since 2000. Visit his recently updated website, http://www.soulmate-secrets.com for a free chapter of his powerful book.

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Times Have Changed: The Automobile, Social Values and Dating

Have you ever looked closely at historic images of cities, say from the 1930′s? The social atmosphere is very different. The fronts of buildings were positioned close to the sidewalk, families lived close to the center of town with a place to sit outside to greet the passersby, and the traffic was chiefly pedestrian. As a result, dating has drastically been affected by modern changes in the past 50 years.

The pedestrian and social enemy, the automobile: Since the invention of the automobile, designers and builders had to make space for parking. Well, this was a challenge at best as each automobile requires around one hundred square feet. A person requires approximately four square feet of space. Vehicular lanes had to be accommodated, restricting space for pedestrians, and adding vehicular and pedestrian conflict. Moreover, the vehicle is now regarded as the most important component of our transportation infrastructure with regard to safety and efficiency. What does this do to our social space? After the engineers design a street, and the builders accommodate the parking at the front of the buildings, the once social space turns into dead, vehicular only, depressing places. Imagine walking next to the parking lot of a shopping mall, next to a six lane arterial highway. Not much chance that you will find another pedestrian with which to rub shoulders. Conversely, a historic place such as Boston, is packed with life, and very little suburbs. In suburbia, the place to find your next date, the Circle K convenience store.

Prior to the proliferation of the automobile, people met on the streets. Pedestrians filled the streets with life that we can easily imagine, and is demonstrated in most historic cities around the world. In the historic town of Ybor City in Tampa, an old Cuban cigar manufacturing city, the workers had little houses called “casitas” which exhibited high ceilings, raised floor for air convection, and a quaint and approachable front porch. Every Saturday, the family would walk to the center of town to meet the neighbors, rub shoulders with others, and do the weekly shopping. Vehicles were not necessary, neither were large houses. The outside public spaces served as an extension of the interior space of their homes. This experience is still shared in many towns in Europe.

How are we easily able to meet new people during these modern times of suburbs, proliferation of the automobile, and a new understanding of an internal world. Computers and cell phones have been the crutch for the absence of social places. It would be nice to revive the values we once had, on the safe pedestrian filled streets and plazas.

About the Author

Patrick Hood-Daniel is an Urban Designer/Architect that pays special attention to our social atmosphere in relation to our physical environment. He is also the developer of http://www.datinganddating.com an online dating service where members can find dates in a totally unique way.

Read more: Times Have Changed: The Automobile, Social Values and Dating

Top Wedding Trends for 2006

Along with the beautiful summer weather comes another wonderful wedding season. This is the time of year when literally thousands of weddings take place. While weddings have not changed much over the years, there are always some noticeable trends that come into play. Everyone wants to do something a little bit different, if only to add an element of individuality to their wedding ceremony. Some of this year’s biggest trends have to do with the creative use of color in attire and in flowers.

While traditional white is not likely to be surpassed in popularity, there are some other interesting and tasteful color options that have really taken off. This year, the color purple is the color to beat. From lavender to eggplant, purple is one of those colors that are both timelessly rich and elegant. This year, it is being used in everything from bridesmaids’ dresses to cocktail napkins. Lilac is a wonderful choice of color for a summertime wedding, no matter where you decide to use it.

While flowers come in a veritable rainbow of colors, more and more people are using dyed flower arrangements in their weddings. More often than not, this is done to accentuate the choices of color used in the clothing of those in the wedding party. Some of the most popular wedding flowers for 2006 include gardenias, lilies, orchids, and daisies. Another popular trend we have noted is the use of wild flowers that have a fresh-cut look.

As far as wedding cakes are concerned, we are starting to see a lot of people trying to tie their cake style into the theme of their wedding. For instance, a springtime wedding cake might be topped off with edible flower petals. We are also starting to see many couples straying away from the traditional bride-and-groom cake toppers, and opting instead for monogrammed letters or sugar sculptures. The average cake size continues to be in the four-to-five tier range.

Regarding the actual wedding ceremony, we have witnessed an increasing number of couples exchange vows while facing their guests. More and more, couples are also writing their own vows. We are seeing more children directly involved in the wedding, too. While every couple wants their special day to be unique and memorable, these are just some of the ways in which couples are personalizing their wedding ceremonies in 2006.

About the Author

Samantha Taylor can hardly wait for her special day! When she is not obsessing over every little detail of her upcoming wedding, she writes for yourwedding101.com – an insightful online guide to weddings and wedding planning, with information about bridal showers, wedding invitations, honeymoons and more.

Read more: Top Wedding Trends for 2006